Christmas Jokes: The Twelve (Funny) Thank You Notes Of Christmas

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Dec 25

My dearest Edward,

What a delightful surprise! That sweet partridge in a pear tree – how poetic and romantic! Bless you, thank you.

Forever yours,
Emily.

Dec 26

Dear Edward,

The two turtle doves arrived today and are cooing away in the pear tree as I write. How thoughtful and lovely!

With love,
Emily.

Dec 27

Edward, my darling,

You always find the most unique gifts! Three French hens, truly original! I wonder if they really come from France? Shame we don’t have a chicken coop yet, but we’ll manage. Thank you so much; they’re perfect.

Your devoted Emily.

Read Also: Funny Jokes: The Hilarious Cheese Caper in Cheesyville

Dec 28

Dearest Edward,

What a surprise! Four calling birds arrived this morning. They’re sweet, though they’re rather loud, making telephones almost impossible to use. I’m sure they’ll settle in soon enough. Thanks a lot!

Love,
Emily.

Dec 29

Beloved Edward,

This morning, the mailman delivered five exquisite gold rings, one for each finger. A beautiful gift! Honestly, they’re much better than the noisy birds. The four from yesterday are still squawking, and none of us got much sleep. But the rings are lovely, as is your thoughtfulness.

Bless you,
Emily.

Dec 30

Dear Edward,

I never expected to open the door this morning and find six gigantic geese laying eggs all over the porch! To be honest, I hoped the bird gifts would stop by now. They’re ruining the croquet lawn, and we really don’t have space. Thanks, but please no more birds!

Love,
Emily.

Dec 31

Edward,

I distinctly said NO MORE BIRDS. This morning, seven swans arrived, trying to squeeze into our tiny goldfish pond. I’d rather not know what happened to the fish. The house is packed with birds, and the mess they leave is overwhelming. Please, stop!

Yours,
Emily.

Jan 1

Honestly, Edward, I’d rather stick with the birds. What on earth am I supposed to do with eight milkmaids—and their cows? Is this a joke? It’s no laughing matter.

Sincerely,
Emily.

Jan 2

Edward, enough is enough.

You’ve sent me nine ladies dancing. And, judging from their movements, they’re certainly not the graceful kind. The village is shocked to see a troupe of these over-the-top women parading around, and now it’s me and Mother who’re taking the blame. If you value our friendship, kindly stop this madness now!

Emily.

Jan 3

As I write, ten ridiculous old men are prancing all over the garden. And I just noticed they’re taking liberties with the milkmaids! The neighbors are furious, and they’re trying to evict us. I shall never speak to you again.

Emily.

Jan 4

This is the final straw! You know how much I despise bagpipes! Our place now resembles a cross between a zoo and a madhouse. A council inspector has declared it unfit for living. At least Mother’s been taken away in an ambulance—thankfully, she’s been spared the noise. I hope you’re happy.

Emily.

Jan 5

Sir,

Our client, Miss Emily Wilbraham, instructs me to notify you that with the arrival of the entire percussion section of the Boston Symphony Orchestra, and several of their friends, she is left with no choice but to seek an injunction against your actions. I’m arranging for the return of the assorted livestock.

Yours faithfully,
G. Creep,
Attorney at law.