Best Dad joke puns have a reputation for being groan-worthy, corny, and eye-roll-inducing—and that’s exactly why we love them. Somehow, the moment a man becomes a father, his ability to deliver painfully obvious wordplay skyrockets.
But here’s the twist: embarrassing humor isn’t all bad. Studies suggest that dad jokes help kids develop resilience toward embarrassment, making them more confident and comfortable with themselves later in life.
So, in celebration of dads everywhere, we’ve rounded up the Best Dad Joke Puns that are guaranteed to earn laughs, groans, and plenty of dramatic sighs. Perfect for Father’s Day—or any day you feel like annoying your kids just a little.
Our Favorite Best Dad Joke Puns
1. What kind of shoes do frogs wear? Open toad.
2. Did you hear about the red and blue ships that collided? All the sailors were marooned.
3. My neighbor gave me a free roof. It was on the house.
4. Why did the teenager fail his driving test? He thought it was a crash course.
5. Where do surfers learn to surf? At boarding school.
6. A duck walks into a bar and says, “Put it on my bill.”
7. What has a spine but no bones? A book.
8. What do you call a wizard good at ceramics? Harry Pottery.
9. Why did Marie Curie stop dating him? There was no chemistry.
10. Why didn’t the nurse become a doctor? She didn’t have the patients.
11. Why was the Liberty Bell disappointing? It wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.
12. How did Vikings communicate? By Norse code.
13. How did Benjamin Franklin feel about electricity? Shocked.
14. What’s the worst sport? Bad-minton.
15. Why don’t pigs play basketball well? They’re ball hogs.
16. How do ghosts stay fit? They exorcise.
17. What do rabbits need after rain? A hare dryer.
18. Why did the coach put a frog in the outfield? He catches flies.
19. What board game is popular in Prague? Czechers.
20. What kind of shoes do lazy people wear? Loafers.
21. Why didn’t the invisible man go to the dance? No body to take.
22. Dad: “No, I didn’t get a haircut — I got them all cut!”
23. What did one candle say to the other? “Do you want to go out?”
24. Why did the bed wear a disguise? It was undercover.
25. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t return? A stick.
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26. What do you call a smart monster? Frank-Einstein.
27. Why is Hulk good at gardening? Green thumb.
28. What music does a boulder like? Rock ’n’ roll.
29. Why did the elephant quit his job? Working for peanuts.
30. What did the shovel say to the sand? “I dig you.”
31. What are cheap teeth called? Buck teeth.
32. What if all books fell in the ocean? A title wave.
33. Why did the queen visit the dentist? To get crowns.
34. Best fishing music? Something catchy.
35. Why was the pirate ship cheap? It was on sail.
36. Why do dads take extra socks to golf? Hole in one.
37. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
38. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? They’d be bagels.
39. What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment? The letter M.
40. Best bird for construction work? A crane.
41. What did T-Rex use to cut wood? A dino-saw.
42. I got fired as a taxi driver — nobody thought I was fare.
43. What do you call a snake who builds houses? Boa constructor.
44. Where do fish keep money? River bank.
45. Why put money in the freezer? Cold hard cash.
46. When does it rain money? When there’s change.
47. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything.
48. What do a tick and Eiffel Tower have in common? Paris sites.
49. Why was the banana factory worker fired? Bent ones.
50. My son asked for a bookmark… he still doesn’t know my name.
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51. Why was the broom late? It over-swept.
52. Whoever stole my depression meds — I hope you’re happy now.
53. Why can’t leopards hide? Always spotted.
54. Two monkeys sharing Amazon? Prime mates.
55. Penguin in the White House? Lost.
56. Lazy baby kangaroo? Pouch potato.
57. Llama to his date: “Alpaca lunch.”
58. Anti-gravity book? Impossible to put down.
59. Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot.
60. Most condescending bear? Pan-duh.
61. Witch’s car sound? Brrrroooom.
62. Soap in mouth while singing? Soap opera.
63. I know only 25 letters — I don’t know y.
64. How does the moon cut hair? Eclipse it.
65. Factory making OK products? Satisfactory.
66. Janitor jumping out: “Supplies!”
67. Buffalo to son at school: “Bison.”
68. Geometry is where I draw the line.
69. Why do bees have sticky hair? Honeycomb.
70. Chiropractors’ favorite music? Hip pop.
71. Five toes but not your foot? My foot.
72. Cannibal’s last meal? Five Guys.
73. “It’s pasture bedtime.”
74. Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe.
75. Worst thesaurus ever? Terrible.
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The Ultimate Best Dad Joke Puns Finale
76. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Outstanding in his field.
77. Angry sheep + moody cow? Baaaad mooood.
78. Can kangaroo jump higher than buildings? Buildings can’t jump.
79. Sink to toilet: “You look flushed.”
80. Snowman tantrum? Meltdown.
81. Lost winter weight — spring rolls.
82. Two kittens tragedy? Cat-astrophe.
83. Best beach food? Sandwich.
84. Guitar giveaway? No strings attached.
85. What do dads say after fixing something? “That’s not going anywhere.”
86. Why did the math book look sad? Too many problems.
87. What do clouds wear? Thunderwear.
88. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
89. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
90. Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed.
91. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
92. Why can’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack up.
93. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
94. Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven eight nine.
95. Why did the bicycle fall over? Two-tired.
96. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
97. Why did the computer catch a cold? Left its Windows open.
98. Why did the tomato blush? Saw the salad dressing.
99. What do you call magic dogs? Labracadabradors.
100. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
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